so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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