i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
