what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
