How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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