So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
