The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
