who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
