i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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