stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
