If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
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