I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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