bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Randomize
