He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
