After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
