ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
What a dumb baby whore.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
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