just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
