dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Duck Duck Cougar?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
