i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
A bitchslap is in order.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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