did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
