It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
