Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Maybe he injected his testicle?
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