no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Randomize
