i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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