Four minutes until I can fart!
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize
