you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I am one with the molecules
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
