is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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