The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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