I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
