There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
