hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
