I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Found your dick twin last night
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
we're so committed to being not committed
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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