she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
