Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize