You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
