I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
