Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Are my feet made of real feet?
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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