i think my mom watched the whole time
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
