i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
