Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
