i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
