How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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