My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
