be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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