We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
You should frame my arrest warrant.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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