wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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