question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
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