i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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