You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
