I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
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