Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
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